“Your visions will become clear only when you can look into your own heart. Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes.”
― C.G. Jung
Those that follow my blog will know I live down a lane which comes off another lane. It’s a single track lane and it’s still exciting on wet days and if I meet a nervous driver coming round the corner but I have to thank the lane for making me an amazing reverser. If there are reversing races and reversing agility events (and I’m sure there’s somewhere on this earth) then I would do well.
Driving up our lane a few weeks ago I was just nearing the top and I could see the bend and the beginning of the cottage I had an amazingly strong feeling and could almost see myself stopping the car, opening the door and running to the cottage. I could feel the adrenaline through my body as in my mind’s eye I was sprinting as fast as I could. My heart was racing and I was quite startled but by the time I had driven round the bend and started to take the left hand swing into the driveway all was normal again but I was feeling confused. I parked, got out of the car and walked round to where I had felt strange but felt nothing…
I drove up and down the lane many times and hadn’t felt what I had again and pretty soon I just forgot about it. I didn’t tell anyone as there wasn’t really anything to tell and could you imagine the conversation? Hubbie is pretty sceptical about all my ‘hunches’ and ‘intuitions’ which don’t happen that often but I can say that too many times I know who is calling when the phone rings even before I pick it up without looking at caller ID.
But then it happened again.
In the same spot of the lane just before the bend as I could see the house I had the same intense feeling of stopping the car flinging the door open and running towards the cottage. It was still just as intense with my heart racing but after parking nothing was amiss everything looked in place. I then began to think about it a lot. I wanted to work out what it was about. I have a faith but I don’t go to church and I have had intense feelings and strange ‘occurrences’ before. I dreamed a song and wrote it down once and when I was clearing up our last house I went to empty the pan full of dust (from the dust pan and brush) and I had an intense angry voice saying that if I didn’t want the money in the pan I should go out and find someone who needed it. ‘Oh my life’ you’re thinking ‘she hears voices’ but in my entire life there have only been a few instances and they are all very different. Are they visions? Should I try to interpret them? I have no idea. They don’t freak me out and I’m not worried by them, maybe they are a tired mind reacting to stimulus around it either consciously or unconsciously.
The other day I told everyone on my facebook page that I had sat with a chap who’d had a crash whilst we were waiting for the ambulance to arrive. We sat looking at his upturned van both amazed by how lucky he was to be, apparently, unhurt. He was shaking and we just sat in near silence and then I left him when the paramedics arrived. What I didn’t tell everyone was that I had stopped at a junction looked round the right hand bend and saw his van and he was just kicking his way out of it through the passenger side window. I flung open the car door and ran towards the van and realised I was living my vision. I looked behind me and the white cottage on a right hand bend was the same as ours. It has the same lean too chimney on the left hand side, the same cream paintwork and the same arched window frames. Yes there are differences but what I could see was identical to the cottage I live in.
Now if I wanted too I could say that I was meant to be there, I was meant to sit on the wall watching that upturned van waiting for the paramedics to arrive. I was perfectly calm; I am in a crisis involving other people and knew I should try to help. I could bend the situation to fit any idea framework I wanted and create the evidence to make it true but there are differences. I didn’t approach the van driver in the same way I had our cottage, it was the other way round so the positions are all wrong and what I can saw in my mind’s eye isn’t strictly true but what I can say is that I haven’t had those feelings driving up the lane since and it’s been 3 weeks.
I don’t think I’ll ever really know or understand why my mind occasionally produces these dreams and feelings. We don’t use 100% of our brains capabilities so who knows what those unchartered areas are for or whether we ever will. Some people claim to be psychic, some see Ghosts but most of us have a healthy scepticism when it comes to those things we can’t see, reach or fully understand. I’m not scared by my hunches and intuitions, like I said they don’t happen that often to interfere with my life but when they do – I have lived in a house with a ghost – I do think about them but rationalise that I am on this earth for such a short time and what will be, will be. Maybe in a few years’ time scientists will have researched more and discovered that there are reasons as to why some brains work like this then we’ll have an answer but that that may not be in my life time.
For the mean time if it happens again, I’ll let you know and we can all see if there is a consequence…